Observing Sweden - 9 April

This was a very good day. We got our car! I was so worried. I mean, they took away my guns, and then my knives (pocket knives illegal here - huge fine) and me with no car. For an American this is about as bad as it gets.

Yesterday we took three trains to get to Gothenburg. The transfers were surprisingly easy, just got off one train, walked across the platform (12 yards) then a 10 minute wait. Wife had our tickets on her cellphone. Conductors just look at the code number. Technology far beyond my 75 year old brain. She used same cellphone take some photos of the small town 

stations on the way.

Trip took 5 hours. We arrived around midnight and it was seriously cold, first time I’ve been that cold since arriving in Sweden. 

Next day the fun began. First stop was the customs office which was far from our hotel - three bus rides or a cab, We took the cab - eighty bucks. Lou had a stack of papers two inches thick: titles, shipping documents, various declarations, mileage, bills of sale, previous owners, my passport, permanent resident card, my birth certificate, marriage license, her birth certificate, American driver's license and paper saying her Swedish driver’s licence was in the mail.

She must have signed and filled out a dozen documents. I just watched in a clueless state of anxiety, understanding little of what was being said and waiting to find if we were missing some obscure document. In between time wondering if our Volvo had survived the trip. Sounds weird, shipping a Volvo to Sweden, but cars are much more expensive here, Everything is much more expensive here!

Forty minutes later it was over. We had passed customs! Now another cab to the port of arrival. Gothenburg is the biggest seaport in Sweden. Then more documents, but not as many this time, and we were given permission to wait for someone to take us inside; only one of us was allowed to go and Lou seemed the obvious choice since she speaks the language. I waited at the gate with exit 

papers. Would the car start after spending a month in a container? After a stressful thirty minutes Lou appeared smiling in our undamaged and fully operational car. It was over - Not!

For some reason they made me take the license plates off before shipping in Seattle. I never thought to pack ‘em. It’s illegal to drive here without plates even though we had the completed paperwork from customs. It is also illegal to drive without insurance. We could not get insurance because the car had not arrived in Sweden when we left to pick it up. 

We drove home on back roads, seven hours and over 300 miles with our hearts in our mouths. Believe it or not we did not see a single police car! Thank God! We saw lots of moose warning signs, but no moose.

We made it home without incident. It felt wonderful to drive again - first time since we left, but we don’t dare to drive again until we fill out more papers, register the car and get plates.

Now we are waiting for furniture to arrive.

Buckminster & Amber - 38

The servants have been away all day. No idea where they went. They left us a cheap bowl of dry food next to the water fountain and took off to God knows where - or why. But when the servant’s away the cats can play . . . on the laptop.

So where was I? Bucks. Well, as you can see from the photo he’s been making plans, though how he thinks he can get away with that bag is beyond me, and him. Like I told you before he’s not exactly a rocket scientist.

But there’s more to the story. He’s been emailing some sex kitten called Foxie. I have no idea who she is  or where she lives, but with a name like Foxie . . . I mean, really. I intend to keep reading his mail which isn’t difficult. Guess what his password is - The Buckster. Took me almost two minutes to figure that one out.

Observing Sweden - Food 1

Swedish meat ads are starting to turn me into a vegetarian!

Buckminster & Amber -37

There’s something that’s been on my mind all week and after considerable thought I think I need to share it with you, but you’d better sit down. I mean like, this isn’t good. Valerie has already expressed some concern about this and I’m sure some of my other followers are worried as well. It’s about Bucks, of course, and our time here in these Swedish house, which is a bit spacey I must admit.

But its not that bad. We had some excellent salmon for dinner last night and it’s nice not to hear those damn airplanes flying over the house night and day. We lived directly under the SeaTac Airport flight path in Seattle. I enjoy the peace and quiet but Bucks seems to be more depressed every day.

Why don’t you start learning Swedish, I tell him. “I don’t do Swedish,” he answers. The truth is he hasn’t been doing much of anything . . . just mopes around and complains. He threatens to run away again, like he did in when we lived in the States. He was lucky to get back in one piece after that encounter with the killer coyote. (Buckminster & Amber - 18) Boots saved his tail that time, but there’s no Boot’s here.

Oh, here he comes, and I can see he’s in another one of his bad moods. I’d better stop for now.

More later,

Amber

Observing Sweden - 6 April 2013

Details:

Name day

Each day has a persons’s name attached to it. Actrually two or three names now; the keep adding.Today’s names are Vilhelm and William. There is no Bruce day. What about Bruce Springsteen, Bruce Lee, Bruce Wayne, and Robert the Bruce? A sad omission. People send e-mails to friends celebrating their name days.

Cell phones.

250,000 Swedes do not have cell phones. They are all dead. All living Swedes have at least one and call someone every ten or fifteen minutes-at restaurants, at home, at the bank, in the car . . . wherever. Unending conversations with each other. Swedes are very big on communication. There are more cellphones per meter here than any other place on earth.

Weapons

After giving up my beloved guns I thought I was now a law abiding alien. Yesterday at a department store a clerk was trying to unwrap a battery charger I wanted to look at. “I need a knife,” he said. He came back with a tiny thing the size of a nail clipper. “That’s not a knife. This is a knife,” I told him in a Crocodile Dundee impersonation. He freaked out when I opened my pocket knife. “Those are illegal here!” he told me. It’s not a big knife, just an average pocket knife. Shall I remain defenseless or risk jail?

Moose Lights

Many cars here have a pair or trio of huge spotlights that cast a glare equal to that of a landing passenger aircraft. These are to enable night time out of town drivers to spot a moose that has decided to cross the road. A dozen or more drivers are killed each year by running into a moose.

Once a year there it's moose hunting season here. Driver’s revenge!

Buckminster & Amber 36

“See Bucks, I told you we’d be getting furniture eventually . . . and this nice rug besides.”

“Big deal. It’s just one bloody chair, and used at that. It smells like dog breath.”

“I don’t think so. Smells okay to me, Bucks. You have such a negative attitude.”

“Yeah, right. You ever try to hide behind a single chair? We’re spending most of our lives inside the closet. Your cousin Marvin will be out of the closet before we are.”

“Leave Marvin out of this. He’s doing quite well as a designer at Fancy Felines in Chicago. You should get a job.”

“I’m very happily retired. I spent years as leader of the Rat Patrol in Scotland before my family immigrated to America. My ancestors were very well to do and famous for inventing the catapult, though history books seldom mention it.”

“Your ancestors invented the nap, more likely. And I notice you’ve been sleeping on the chair.”

“It matches my coat - a bit of camouflage.”

“I’ll bet you couldn’t find me if I wanted to hide, Bucks. I’ve found a new place, but I’m not telling you where it is.”

“Whatever.”

Observing Sweden - Week 3 - B

This house is in itself a mystery - high-tech with fire-wire internet.

There’s a UPS somewhere that turns lights on and off outside, and an underfloor heating system far beyond my comprehension.

Light switches are arranged in clusters, hard to figure out what turns things on and off, the ceiling’s full of little spotlight LEDs, each with a dimmer.

Six switches in this cluster, after three weeks I'm still unsure which one does what. A guessing game each night.

The refrigerator light does not come on when door’s first open, waits to see if one is really looking for something, maybe thirty-five or forty seconds, then illuminates . . . environmental friendly.

Other things I took for granted in the States are missing. This refrig does not make ice - first ice cube trays I've seen in years. There is no garbage grinder in the sink. Both things are missing for environmental reasons I suspect. Cat litter must be taken to the city dump a couple miles from where we live.

The dump itself is and environmental masterpiece, and free. There is no charge for getting rid of stuff. There are separate containers for paper, plastic, metal . . . old TVs. Still more bins wait for motor oil, old tires, cloth things and wood.

The wood is ground up and made into pellets for fireplaces. Plastic is recycled and somehow they make money from stuff they get out of the old televisions. Other Scandinavian countries send their trash to Sweden and pay for the service.

A watchtower that reminds me of a U.S. prison keeps an eye on things. Two guys in uniforms below make sure the rules are followed. Impressive.

Even Burger King’s environmentally correct. 

Three choices for disposal: Compost, Combustible and Drinks.